Sunday, January 29, 2012

The Open Road

I've been feeling very settled and committed here in Salt Lake. I have favorite restaurants and favorite friends and a routine.  Then I remembered the storage space in Austin Texas that houses the remains of the last time I committed to a place. A bed and dressers and shelves and table and chairs and dishes. The proof of my life that resides in my memory as a paradox between the best time in my life and the hardest time I would ever hope to experience. 

...And it's days like this that I think of curling up in my bed in downtown Austin with my lovely dog and hot tea and living in my solitude. 

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

babe, I know that its your soul but could you bottle it up?

While getting my haircut yesterday I got into an intense conversation with my stylist about life. She said something that stuck with me:

"People are only as healthy as their darkest secret."

Think about that for a second.. I have a lot of thoughts but not able to eloqently deliver them yet. to be continued...

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Thine Approval On Us Shine

My gauge of whether or not I'm happy in my life is if I'm in a situation where I have the ability to progress... Unhappiness comes from stagnation; stagnant emotions, stagnant job, stagnant relationship.

I realized today that the reason I am so unexplainably happy is that there are opportunities for progression in every area of my life. The excitement and hope for that is creating a deep rooted feeling of joy.

Wednesday, January 18, 2012


When I was a sophomore in high school I had a crush on a senior from a neighboring high school. We had mutual friends and he was dreamy and I had just grown boobs, so obviously we were perfect.

I don't know how or why this happened, but at some point in our juvenile relationship he began wearing a small green wrist band that I gave him. It was small enough to be forgettable, but Lime Greem enough for me to notice.

Only his friends and my friends knew what it meant, however, it was the deepest form of commitment that I needed. It was an unspoken display of security.

Ten years later, I am wondering how to muster that courageous naivety so as to feel secure from such a small token.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012


A couple of years ago the Dial women entered into a Diet Challenge, (wrote about it here). Midway through the competition, Kyria and I moved back to Utah and lived together. We dedicated ourselves to a very clean diet (with the exception of dates at Steak Houses) and spent our free time at the gym. For a number of reasons we kept our passes to Lifetime Fitness, which was over 30 minutes from our apartment. Everyday after school and work we would make the trek to South Jordan and spend 3-4 hours at the gym. We scoped on the regulars, got to know the trainers, took classes, etc.

We BREATHED Lifetime Fitness.

Kyria and I often look back on that time with fond memories. We didn't date. We didn't party. We went to the gym. So, with this background, you can imagine the joy we felt yesterday when we decided to return to LT together and recommitt to the best gym in the world.

I'm happy to say that since 2009 I have taken on a more realistic approach to my health, and therefore, this is not going to turn back into one of those excessive gym additions. I will say, however, after being back at Lifetime Fitness, it's a wonder any other gym is still in business.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012


I have been listening to the same songs for the past 24 hours. I think it's pretty telling of how my year is going so far.

A sexy song, a tender song, and a wedding song. Heaven help me.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

Thank You iTunes

Top 5 Sad Songs

5. black + blue christina perri
4. fall for your type jamie foxx
3. one more night the stars
2. after the storm mumford and sons
1. bad diary days pedro the lion

Top 5 Love Songs

5. the beacon a fine frenzy
4. so special lil wayne
3. make you feel my love garth brooks
2. just in time elizabeth and the catapult
1. one and only adele

Top 5 Anytime songs

5. we looked like giants death cab for cutie
4. anything can happen wyclef jean
3. run taylor swift
2. wouldn't get far the game
1. baby don't fabolous